Wednesday, November 16, 2011

I Was Wrong

I thought that when my husband lost his job and we told her it was time to move...that I would be thrown into RAD HELL.

I was wrong.

I thought that when we moved out of state...away from family, friends, our backyard view, our Sunday School class, our home-educating co-op, our favorite librarian...most of what was safe and secure and familiar...then for sure I would be thrown into RAD HELL.

I was wrong.

I thought that arriving in a new place...with boxes to unpack, a lot of anxiety, & practically zero connections and no real plan to speak of....well then that there would be the very thing that would cause the straw to break on the camel's back and I would be thrown into RAD HELL.

I was wrong.

I thought that the stress of her leaving old friends and meeting new friends would most definitely spiral me into RAD HELL.

I was wrong.

I thought that leaving behind a beloved Math Tutor at the very moment Geometry was entering our lives...would be the death of me for SURE. A slow painful TORTURED DAILY in RAD HELL sort of death.

I was wrong.

Girlie has handled the turning upside down of the only world she has ever known since arriving in the states all those many years ago in a lovely manner.

She's got big feelings. As do we all. She's identifying her feelings and talking about her feelings.

She's brave.

I was so wrong. So wrong about her.

And another thing....did you notice how I thought I would be in RAD HELL? ME. Me. Me. And Dad. And the siblings. To be sure.

This stuff affects the entire family. Everyone struggles.

For a long time...that was why I was so angry.

At her.

But really, I was angry w/the Lord for allowing this difficulty. In her life. In our lives.

Gotta make peace with the Lord. He is a loving Father. He is sovereign. And he reigns.

Things haven't been super smooth...don't get me wrong. But it's no where as bad as my previous experiences told me it would be.

Lesson: Do not live in the past. Live life now and hope for a better tomorrow.


Simply Moms said...

so hard, but so good!