good blog post...goes for RAD too.
There is a flip side however. Sometimes, as parents dealing with attachment issues...we can go overboard with the not wanting our kids to engage inappropriately with others ...or visa versa...though.
It's because we know that many times they are being superficial.
And that they engage with every Tom, Dick, and Harry while out and about BUT not with intimates at home.
That they are trying to win random strangers or Joe Shmo acquaintance's approval.
This attempt of theirs is not only a grab for attention...but a grab for control. Controlling their environment...even to the point of attempting to control others perception of them...is a huge temptation.
As parents...we want to train and guide our kids...in the ways we see fit. The ways we believe will most benefit them in the short term and in the long run. We want to protect them.
One of the hardest things to do is to let go and to sit back and watch. And to allow natural consequences to play out in the lives of our struggling kids.
When others do not think it's so cute anymore as a child/tween/teen refuses to stop nonsense chattering about NOthing.... when a child/tween/teen is constantly disregarding other people's personal spaces and hangs a littletoocloseforcomfort...or isolates in uncomfortable and strange attention seeking ways...when self control & self awareness are lacking in a child/tween/teen...etc...etc.... etc.
We can tell them until we are blue in the face why A B or C is inappropriate or when enough is enough...but in my experience...a handful of incidents where others catch on and have had enough...and get to the point of mentioning something...well....those sorts of moments speak volumes.
Thursday, August 8, 2013
good blog post
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