Monday, June 27, 2011


WAR on RAD battle #3-safe guard your marriage. We've talked about this before, but I cannot stress it enough. There has to be something there when they move out. Carve out time to be alone together no matter what. And no movies. No screens. Be face to face. Spend 15 minutes decompressing about RAD and then no more. Talk about dreams and goals and sweet memories. Affirm to each other your fear of God. I am not kidding. Seriously say out loud that you love Jesus and no matter what happens you will always obey. . .hat you will choose to work it out and stay married. The verbalization is good for you and good for the heart of your spouse.

I am not suggesting apathy towards RAD. . . I'm suggesting a direct focus of importance. Nothing else can have your attention if the primary earthly relationship is not being nurtured. You need time to laugh and rest and say "this matters." I know it's hard. I know sitters are horrible. I know you will pay for it tomorrow. But something happens when you are connected and have laughed together. You are better equipped to handle the cuh-RAZ-eeeeee that is sure to come. That would come if you went out or didn't.


Anonymous said...

Thank you for the reminder to keep our marriages strong. My husband and I have had our RAD child for only 8 months and our marriage is a complete and total mess. My husband is an adult with RAD and the rejection from our new son just sets him off into his own spiral. I am at such a loss on how to help them both!