Friday, June 24, 2011


I haven't been sleeping lately. Our home is a mess of tension and stress. My PTSD girlie has been in a spiral and my RADish is in a full regression. Ok, not full, because God help us if we go back to the way things were when she first came home. But we are pretty close. I was laying in bed last night praying and I woke this morning with a new resolve. A quiet, firm whisper in my heart.

I am declaring WAR on RAD! Now, hear me. I am not declaring war on my child. But on RAD and what it is doing----what we've let it done--in our home and to our family. RAD is like a fortress around my daughter's heart. She loves her fortress and she will do anything, including sin against the people around her to not only stay in that fortress but to protect it. To protect the safety she thinks it is.

What her Daddy and I know, though, is that it is a prison. It is a cheap, less than second rate version of safety. It is isolating and troubling and full of horrible things. She won't be able to flourish until the fortress is destroyed.

With that visual, I instantly thought of things I need to do or change to get my game face on, so to speak.

Number one top priority: Get the whole family involved.

In our home, we haven't stressed the label of RAD. We talked about it once and for weeks she would play victim to her history and not take responsibility for her actions. So we talk about her actions and feelings and heart. It seems to work well.

We got the whole family on board in helping sister's heart grow. Sister's heart is very small right now (or balloon analogy or something) but we know that it can get big and strong. Sometimes she thinks that she needs to choose sin and try and be in control. The best way you can help her is to use your words to tell her how you feel and not hide any wrong choices from Mommy. We need to know what's going on to make sure everyone is safe and to help everyone get stronger and healthier.

We are acknowledging that there is tension verbally, having everyone combat the sin in our home and giving those that are weaker in the home a voice. We cannot survive our days with RAD and be alive at the end of it. We have to improve, get healthier and strive to be a unit no matter how hard RAD tries to divide us.

War on RAD--everyone knows their words and actions to deal with behaviors from RAD

RADtastic normal we never thought we'd live---tattling is not only okay, it is encouraged.


Anonymous said...

Hi, I just wanted to tell you that I am so blessed to have found your blog. Today I found out that I have adult RAD and it was a painful thing to realize I have something like that. What makes me so drawn to your blog is that you are following Christ and that is so encouraging that God lead me to your blog. I am inspired by your blog to start posting about my struggle with RAD and my coming to Christ. Since I have been saved, my RAD has been getting better and I am no longer a victim of everything. I just wanted to say thank you and I am so blessed to read your blog. I pray blessings upon blessings on you and your family and for your journey with our Father.

Thank you so much!


Simply Moms said...

I think it is awesome that you are identifying this and working towards healing. Keep your eyes fixed on Christ and His sovereignty.