Hope

I was up all night tossing and turning.

Worried.

Concerned for the future.

Distressed.

Anxious.

Over my morning cup of coffee I started to calm down.  For some strange unexplainable reason...a sense of hope began to rise up.  In my troubled heart.  Hope showed up.

Peace.

A super natural peace.

A peace that flew directly in the face of the evidence.

Girlie awoke.  She was softer.  I got a "God Bless you..." after a sneeze.  She sat near me on the couch.  She wanted to be close.  On my terms...not hers.

I'm hoping we are finished with the "crazy cycle..."  I mentioned nonchalantly.

It was the open door she needed.

"Yeah, me too."

After having her read the "Out Crazy the Crazy" post...I asked her to sit quietly and process her feelings and thoughts.

She immediately and instinctively tried to blame the spiral on some little thing.

"Pickle," I said.

Immediate submission.  She knew darn well that her trying to blame this spiral on something it was so not about...was not going to fly.

But unlike during mid spiral times..I had her attention.  I had her heart.  It was turned towards me.

I asked her to write down all that she was feeling over the past few days.

Girlie chose to go deeper.

She just now said, "Thanks for out crazing my crazy, Mom"...

... and she's writing her little heart out.

Hope.