Just out of curiosity, how many of you feel your social worker knows about RAD, understands RAD, equipped you for RAD, etc?
Reply anonymously if you'd like.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Social Workers.
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a place for followers of Christ dealing with various stages of attachment
Labels
- Cate (106)
- Dawn (281)
- encouraging moment (61)
- history (3)
- ideas to build attachment (39)
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- new normal (1)
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Send in your hearts so that others might be encouraged by the gentle whispers of the Lord's love.
Feel free to leave anonymous comments. We know how intimidating and frightening navigating this territory can be. You are not alone...and chances are...you're probably not crazy.
Thanks for the bloglove, Brenda
- Simply Moms
- We are not experts. We are not offering professional advice, diagnosis or support. We are merely two families (friends) sharing our experiences, what the Lord has revealed to us and a shoulder to help bear others' burdens.
Childhood Symptoms
*Superficially charming and engaging, particularly around strangers or those who they feel they can manipulate
*Indiscriminate affection, often to strangers; but not affectionate on parent's terms
*Problems making eye contact, except when angry or lying
*A severe need to control everything and everyone, worsens as child gets older
*Hypervigilant
*Hyperactive, yet lazy in performing tasks
*Argumentative, often over silly or insignificant things
*Frequent tantrums or rage, often over trivial issues
*Demanding or clingy, often at inappropriate times
*Trouble understanding cause and effect
*Poor impulse control
*Lacks morals and values
*Little or no empathy; often have not developed a conscience
*Cruelty to animals
*Lying for no apparent reason
*False allegations of abuse
*Destructive to property or self
*Stealing
*Constant chatter, nonsense questions
*Abnormal speech patterns
*Developmental/learning delays
*Fascination with fire/blood/gore; will usually make the bad choice
*Problems with food; either hoarding or refusing
*Concerned with details but ignoring main issues
*Few or no long term friends; tend to be loners
*Attitude of entitlement or self importance
*Sneaks things without permission even if she/he could have them by asking
*Triangulation of adults; pitting one against the other
*A darkness behind eyes when raging
*Parents appear to be overcontrolling
Books for Parents
- Attaching in Adoption by Deborah D. Gray
- Disconnected Kids by Robert Milillo
- Sensational Kids by Lucy Jane Miller
- Shepherding A Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp
- The Connected Child by Dr. Purvis
- The Whole Life Adoption Book by Jayne E. Schooler
- Toddler Adoption, The Weaver's Craft by Mary Hopkins-Best
Books for Kids
- Let's Talk About It : Adoption by Fred Rogers
- Adopted and Loved Forever
- Jin Woo
- Little Miss Spider
- Borya And The Burps
- I Love You Like Crazy Cakes
- Tell Me Again About The Night I Was Born
- Stuart Little
Films
- Bella
- Dan In Real Life
- Inn of The Seventh Happiness
- Martian Child
- Stuart Little
- The Italian
Blog Archive
Not for Us, But for You to Know the Others Near You for Support
7 comments:
We dont know each other, but I really enjoy your blog, it has been so educational and meaningful. I am adopted myself (I do not have RAD but have had my share of issues dealing with attachment that always got overlooked). I am actually an undergrad majoring in Human Growth and Development (pursuing a career in global orphan care). We actually have somewhat studied adoption and particularly RAD and had a parent with a child with RAD who came and educated our class. I feel like more awareness for adoption and attachment is so needed and so necessary, not only for families who are adopting but those families friend’s too... Keep blogging, keeping you and your family in my prayers :).. don’t know why, just felt like I needed to share that with you! God Bless.
My experience is that social workers know the tip of the iceburg about this topic. Some also think the label is a new catch-all phrase and many are being over-diagnosed like the early days of ADHD. But I think that it is difficult for some to admit that the disorder exists and even harder for them if they admit it, to assent to the proper treatment. Though the intent of foster care is excellent (to protect children from abuse and neglect and place them in safe homes) it is often a very long time that children must stay in foster care moving from home to home until they are finally free for adoption. Unfortunately, the risk for them to develop RAD or attachment disorder only increases with many years in the system. Knowing that, it might be harder for a social worker to admit that that system they idealize and work for could play into such a condition rather than prevent it. There are some who really understand but it seems they too feel like their hands are tied to get enough support for the family who adopts/fosters. We have had some good caseworkers and some of them have understood to a point but noone can really grasp it unless they live, daily, with it.
zitch zero nada from both of ours
Dawn
Savannah, welcome. You are so right. There is some brief talk but not enough information. Thank you for your prayers.
~C
BeckyJoie-it is so hard. But unfortunately it is like a doctor not knowing how to id an ear infection. :(
Our case worker is newer, but honestly I don't think any of the ones I have talked to really know anything about it. I have a friend who is a case worker and she so often thinks things I tell her about is him just working me or being manipulative. We are new to this all, only been foster parents for 4 1/2 months to my cousin, and he has alot of emotional issues we are trying to help with. The problem is we don't know if he is going home or staying and trying to tell his case worker anything we are dealing with seems to not be getting through. We told her about how he had a horrible 3 weeks before Christmas(anxiety to the point of vomiting, horrible attitude, usually directed towards me, depressed for 5 days straight and didn't even want to play xbox which is huge for him, huge blowouts) and her response was so he has been acting up. Yeah "acting up."
I am a social worker working with a family that is struggling to provide love, support, stability, and hope for a future to a child with RAD. I have been staying late night after night at work surfing the internet, looking for more understanding, looking for advice, looking for how I can be help this child and family that my heart aches for. I have found parent forums and blogs to be particularly useful because you guys are living it. Hang in there. Great website....so glad you have a place to vent and plan and support one another. In my own agency I will work on sharing any knowledge I gain with my coworkers and colleagues. We need to be able to support and help families like all of yours.
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