Some of our kiddos have food issues. Most of the attachment books will say to let them have non perishable snacks in their pockets or bedside table. I know that works for some families and that is great. But something didn't seem right to my heart about that for us. For one, my girlie wasn't trying to hoard. But she was gorging at meal times. She was actually eating more than my husband. Our pediatrician isn't too worried about it as long as we let her gorge on fruits and veggies. :)
At the heart of it, though, is trust. Not trusting your parent to meet your needs, not trusting your self and sensing your own needs, trusting to communicate those needs. I wanted my baby's needs to be met but I don't always know when she has a need because she doesn't tell me. I also wanted a way to help build that trust between us. The jump from having food available to knowing Mommy was going to meet her hunger seemed too great or would take too long for my little one.
So we created the Anytime Bowl. Here's how it works. A big bowl of fruit (types change every week depending on the season) is on our kitchen counter. We told the kids, "this is the Anytime Bowl. Anytime you are hungry, you can ask for something out of the Anytime Bowl. Anytime you ask, Mommy and Daddy will say YES! Every time! If we just ate breakfast, but you are still hungry, you can ask. If it is dark out and you are hungry, you can ask. If you are sleeping and your are hungry, you can ask. Anytime." Only some of our kids use it regularly but they are starting to get the hang of it. We remind them of it almost every day. Part of that is probably because their needs are met by their regular meals. We feed them their scheduled snacks and meals but no more than 2nds. We can still meet their needs then if they arise but also know they aren't super hungry. They need to trust us to get a piece of fruit but they also know they won't be rejected.
:)
Monday, October 5, 2009
The Anytime Bowl
Posted by Simply Moms at 8:25 AM
Labels: Cate, ideas to build attachment
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3 comments:
I love this idea! I too cannot have kids eating whatever whenever. I have too many kids with too many various issues to make that ok. And, my gorger was on his way to type 2 diabetes. At the urging of his pediatrician he has had to be on a routine for meals and snacks. Thanks for sharing this!
excellent idea...you are an awesome mommy...thanks for passing on your wisdom.
Great idea. Wish this was taught in the fostering arena!
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