I am so encouraged to see how many parents are fighting for their children. Fighting for depth in relationships and fighting for discipleship. I'm posting a few things that have been brought to mind...which we've chosen...sometimes by instinct....sometimes by trial and error...which I believe have worked well.... so far....... with all 5 of our kids
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Home-Education (w/ co-ops)
Pulling out of Sunday School (thru jr. high)
Multi generational corporate worship
co-sleeping (always in early childhood & off and on as desired)
co-bathing w/Mom (boys early childhood / girls indefinitely)
no baby sitters (besides grandparents)
close circle of friendships with lots of like-minded supervision and accountability
consistent , firm, loving discipline (not punishment....we continue to learn this the hard way)
lots of repentance
lots of forgiveness
It is obviously by the Lord's design that what makes sense for our family....these parenting techniques which feel correct for us....also make a world of difference in dealing with RAD stuff. Now there are many RAD specific tools we have used....but that's for another post.
I hope you have a blessed day of rest with your families.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Things That Have Worked
Posted by Simply Moms at 12:48 PM
Labels: Dawn, ideas to build attachment
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4 comments:
I am so on board with all these ideas, but totally new to the concept of co-bathing, especially with boys. Wouldn't it be weird for them to remember what Mama looks like naked when they are older? How do you balance co-bathing with teaching the children what the Lord says about modesty? And why is co-bathing recommended for attachment in general? I'm looking forward to learning more. Thanks!
It's all about connection and intimacy...that special parent and child bond that we hope for.
Again, co bathing felt right for....our....family. We were never given any sort of red flag or conviction that skin to skin contact with our boys & youngest girl was anything other than parent/child intimacy, relationship strengthening and bond building. I remember many a times when my little ones fell asleep at my breast (nursing) while in a warm tub. How I cherish those memories.
With the older girls...home via adoption as toddlers (4.5 & 3.5)....it's been co-bathing since day one. No convictions to do otherwise. And lots of good bonding moments...close contact...safety....security....appropriate touch etc.
(You may consider wearing bathing suits if a history of abuse is either known or suspected.)
Modesty is a heart issue. "Take what works for you under the guidance of the Holy Spirit and throw the rest away."
And I will reitorate.....we are a hippy sort of clan :) One of those families who has all the kids (and grandparents too) in the delivery room....welcoming a new sibling into the world.
Dawn
P.S. I am a horrible Speller....and I see that there is no Spell Check when in the "Comment" section. Sorry for any errors. There's sure to be a few.
When my birth babies were handed to me.....we were naked...skin to skin. They suckled immediately.
While bathing my girls who came home via adoption have been curious about nursing....as they've watched their baby sisiter suckle.
I have let them try.
It was a sweet experience for us.
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